It's official

I've been up for an hour and thirteen minutes, and I have already looked at everything that is interesting on the internet.

I guess just put it in the Goodwill box with the other old toys.

So anyway

I had a bad start to the week. Had a bad dream about Jackie that really sent me in a tailspin. I don't normally put too much stock in dreams, and I didn't in this one either, but when I awakened, I felt sick to my stomach. It just made me think of a million mistakes and wrong priorities I made when we were together, and that combination made for a really dismal Tuesday.

But I'm okay now. Not great, but well, who really is? Alexander was, I guess, or so his title would suggest. King Cyrus of Persia, also. But they're long dead, so they don't really count. In any case, I'm in a better mood. I'm really glad it's Friday.

I just called the cops

I mean honestly, if you're going to scream and slap each other in an apartment complex hallway, what do you think is going to happen? That the rest of the complex can't hear you carrying on?

Steve

Maybe it's because it's the end of the day.

I feel a little better.

But I still wish I could move right away.

I wish

I could move today.

Bad Dreams Lead to Introspection, Finds Area Man

I am:

without a car

overweight

depressed

anxious

having bad dreams

not performing

learning to play "Jump in the Fire"

Spending too much time in my head

unproductive

making crappy artwork

unappreciative

frustrated

feeling so lonesome surrounded by friends*

(but jokes aside, I'm pretty lonely)

self-medicating

foolishly coiffed

getting insufficient sleep

uncertain

full of regret

embarrassed that I'm writing this in a public forum, but aware that I need to air it to someone, and that it might as well be anyone and everyone

overly nostalgic

lackluster

disappointing

disappointed

unsatisfied




Steve


*this is a NOFX lyric, proving that despite other things, I have not lost my sense of humor.

Good job, Democrats.

Now don't fuck this up. Don't make me regret my decision.

Steve