Monday, August 29, 2005

Angry Lesbian Breasts

My girlfriend works at Starbucks. I went up to visit her yesterday while she was at work, and while I was waiting for her to return to our little table with a container of expired fruit, I perused the Starbucks music section, which is usually full of historical pop albums rebranded to remind people that they should buy overpriced coffee and peculiarly named, grown-ups-at-a-party, shout-a-lot type of games. It's also a great place to have the latest and hippest piano-based R&B/jazz fusion/singer-songerwriter/reimagined blues compilation foisted upon you.

This one album I saw was by a band comprised of five woman, who look like Jewel or Joan Osbourne as envisioned by the GAP's ad agency. They look like the kind of women who regularly annoy people with acoustic guitars. Their band's name was Antigone Rising. I can only guess that their sound is the musical equivalent of a menstrual cramp.

I mean, seriously. Antigone Rising? This is what happens when you never make it out of the junior-college theater department.

--The Robo-Pirate

4 comments:

The Stash Dauber said...

hahahahaha. that name is almost too spinal tap to be real.

btw, i _liked_ joan osborne. except for _that song_. i would be the world's shittiest a&r man.

Mikey said...

What is god is one of us? what is god he rides the bus?
Aww fuck it! That's the only verse that I can half-way remember from Joan-O. That song bugged me to no end. It was right up there with that song that went: "Where have all the cowboys gone?" that was the chorus, and another stupid verse there was something about "I(the woman) do the dishes, while you (the man) drink a beer."
I hated that song back in the day when I was drunk and single. I hate that song now that I'm married with kiddies, still drunk occasionally, (but not like back in the day)
Shit! I am Mr. Mom for chrissakes, (not that stupid tv show,) but the movie, the one with Michael Keaton. So, yeah, I take offense to that shit man! How about that beer?
Not really. Lately, nothing offends me. but uppity beeothces singin' shitty ditties on an acoustic are buggin' Believe me I know. I got a fifty-year-old sister who thinks she's joan-friggin'-baez, only without the talent, and without the drive. And to my sister I said...."get in the van beeotch!"
CAn't make it in music without touring, can't make it in music if you're lazy......Hit the road!

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Anancy said...

Ha...In the downtown store we call
them Antigone Sucking.
I am so over female folkies and their Gap/Target image